What you DO get is at times surprising, shocking, bloody and scratch-your-head confusing. It's also a lot of fun - if you don't take your straight-to-DVD movies too seriously and you don't mind a little lot of blood splatter.
Meet Tess (Malin Ackerman,) Dawn (Deborah Ann Woll) and Kara (Nikki Reed) three grindhouse gals sent by Mel (Bruce Willis) to crash a big money dope deal in rural Louisiana. Tess is the Alpha-Female, so what she says - goes. It's up to her to keep the not-so-powder-puff girls in line long enough to pick up the cash.
Sounds simple, right? But, it's not. You learn right away that this is a drug deal gone bad. Before you can say Quentin Trarantino, bullets are flying and the body count is growing. This is after all, set in a rundown diner in the middle of nowhere. These folks didn't come for the dinner theater version of Hello Dolly.
We're treated to some nice noirish double-crosses thanks to Mel's deliveryman Ronny (Academy Award winner Forest Whitaker) and Billy (nice turn by Boardwalk Empire's Shea Whigham). In Catch .44 the best advice is to trust no one and remember that no one can be trusted. It's an easy-to-understand premise that keeps the plot train on the wobbly tracks.
Will Tess, Dawn and Kara make good on the big money drop? Will Ronny double-cross Billy? Will Billy run off with the cash, girls and double-cross Mel? Who knows? Who cares? It's a shoot-em-up blast fest that just begs you to turn off your mind and watch what happens next.
Catch .44 will make lovers of grindhouse films (think Robert Rodriquez) smile with appreciation while nodding that they're in on the joke. It's that Gump, box-of-chocolates type of movie, that's appealing to those with a taste for something different.