Don't Try This At Home

Talkin' Turkey

By Bob on December 9, 2013 4:46 AM

I'm the first to admit I draw light duty with the holiday cooking. Charlotte's the real chef in our house and she always does a fantastic job - from stuffing and side dishes, to wonderful desserts.

I gained 20 pounds just writing this sentence. 

I am obligated to tell you that neither Charlotte or I look like this. Also, have you ever noticed how the little girl (top left) looks like that kid in the movie The Bad Seed?

Me? Turkey's my game and I cook one every year.

My kitchen mantra comes (with apologies) from Jackson Browne: "Make It Easy." My dirty little secret is that about 20 years ago I perfected a way to cook a great turkey and make it so incredibly easy that even I can't screw it up.

 

 

The added flavor is a nice boost to the overall mix

of Paul Simon spices.

In about 3 1/2 hours, you'll be licking your lips.

Since we're Texans (no apologies), I do one thing that adds just a little KICK to this bird. I add a sliced jalapeno to the vegetables.

It doesn't really add that much heat, but the added flavor is a nice boost to the overall mix of Paul Simon spices. Huh? You know...parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme.

Groan all you want, but serve this bird and your relatives will be singing your praises year after year.

The ingredient list is just as easy as the prep and cooking.

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Texas Turkey

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• 1 onion, quartered
• 4 garlic cloves, sliced
• 4 celery stalks, chopped
• 1 jalapeno, sliced lengthwise (optional)
• 1 tablespoon parsley
• 1 tablespoon sage
• 1 tablespoon rosemary
• 1 tablespoon thyme
• 1 (32-ounce) container chicken broth
• 1, 7-8 pound turkey 

Thaw and rinse turkey, remove giblets and/or gravy packet and pat dry. Place turkey in a foil pan or foil-lined roaster. Sprinkle parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme inside and outside of turkey. Stuff turkey breast opening with as much of the onion, garlic, celery and jalapeno as it will hold. Put remaining vegetables in pan with turkey and pour in the chicken broth and one cup of water.  

Bake at 375°F  for 3 to 3 ½  hours, or until skin is golden brown and internal temperature reaches 185 degrees Fahrenheit. Baste occasionally with broth in pan and add water as needed to keep it from drying out.   

Note: This recipe is for a turkey weighing 7-8 pounds. If you have a larger turkey, increase the vegetables and seasonings proportionally.

Here's Jackson Browne singing my kitchen mantra, Take It Easy

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